Again, I can’t sleep, hungry, trying to cook porridge but I ate only half of it, because of nausea, this brain and heart who trying to thinking about you just torture my body.
Yes, this is what I feel now, insomnia.
This is my answer for what you wrote on VKontakte
Just remember, my answers is not from my brain, it’s from my heart (c)
I wrote this exactly after your last conversation.
I was busy with work, then you sent me emoticon, I was happy because you contacted me,finally..
And I leave everything just for answer you, and hope to call you
Hey, check this out
You know, you are everywhere, in my mind, and I can’t avoid that, everytime you always messing my mind, in a positive way of course
I just woke up in the middle of the night just to call you,
I sent message that I will call you in 5 minutes, it’s delivered, which means your phone has internet connection, even no read sign, i’m sure you can sneak it.
But after 5 minutes, I called you, and what I get is “calling” symbol, not “ringing”, which mean you suddenly turned off your internet connection on your phone, why you didn’t say anything? Either you can say no or whatever instead just turn off your internet.
Bandung, August 14 2018
No, not for you.. It’s Farewell from Fris
The only way to gain your trust again is to tell everything with you, right?
Today(13/08) Fris sent me messages, that she wants to apologize for everything and hope us to continue our relationship, below the screenshots
As I mentioned before, finally I called you, and yes, as I realized before, talking with you is just talking with stranger, i can understand, you tried to protect your heart, and I tried to fix everything, both of us have different aim, it’s difficult for doctor to examine patient right if patient never believe doctor? Same as our relationship.
But I need to explain anyway, you know.. I forgot whose quote is this.. A man ego is as fragile as woman’s heart, I keep all of my ego to fix you, I throw everything negative thoughts just to make you feel relax, not afraid.
Yes, you afraid with hope, because it kills you, hope without optimism is useless, because your heart is broken already, you are afraid with hope, same.. different aim, different point of view, no win-win solutions. One of us should make him/herself lower, and i chose myself to do that.
Before it you asked me, “how can people love and hate at the same time?”.. Now you don’t need to ask again.
We are just the same, we feel love and we feel hurt, we trust, and we didn’t trust, we care, and we careless.
Price of our relationship is expensive, Dasha, hope we get the best for this price.
You know I shouldn’t write this, you will not believe it anyway.