I read this article, there are five stages of loss, based by Kübler Ross, who is he? Hah, no matter for me, he said that the first one is:
Denial, yes, when I feel loss of you, that was I felt.
Anger. Of course, this is step when last time we communicate, I was angry for what happened.
Bargaining, now what I was thinking just “what if.. what if..”, you even know that i don’t like that sentence.
Depression, this is what I feel for this looong time.
Acceptance. Unfortunately, I won’t able to move to this step, because I love you so much, I’d prefer depression for a long time. Yes, and destroying my ability to work, think and so on.
Love you so much, D.