Can’t be fine

I can’t be fine, I can’t eat or sleep.

The emotional pain that heartbreak evokes is excruciating. Nothing else matters, no one else matters. I can barely function, think, or move. I feel removed from everyone and alone in a haze of unreality, trapped in my  own shattered world. All I can see is you, D, only you., and all I can feel is terrible pain.

What I want most is for the pain to ease, to stop hurting so badly — but that is not what my mind wants.

When heart just broken, my mind has a very different agenda than I do. As a result, it ends up deceiving and making things worse.

I’d like to repair everything, but you just ran away, and feel happy there, leaving unhappy me.

10.24p

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